​NEW YEAR, SAME YOU

You see it everywhere.  “NEW YEAR, NEW YOU!”  As if, come January 1st, you are going to be a completely different person. How many ways can we decide that this statement is a bunch of marketing BS?

1. The word “new” creates a resounding image of youth that our society already seems obsessed with.  The idea that this “new you” will somehow look/feel/present as someone much younger is deeply intertwined in this.  If it wasn’t, the expression would be “another year, another you.”
2. Which brings up a good “multiple personality” type point.  Why does the new year mean that you have to change who you are?  If you drastically change who you are every single year, wouldn’t that be a little weird?  How often in a lifetime does a person need to completely re-invent themself?  Won’t their friends get confused?  (“I loved the world traveler version of Nancy but this supplement pushing salesperson she became on Jan 1 is super annoying.”) Sometimes we only need self-discovery in limited amounts.

3. Speaking of self discovery, the idea that a new version of yourself is what you should be seeking, implies that there is something seriously wrong with the one that currently exists.  Marketers love to make you feel like they are rooting you on all the while secretly putting you down.  It’s like that snarly relative who always has some sort of backhanded compliment to give like “Ohhh, look at your house!!  It’s SO BEAUTIFUL, when it’s clean.”  Thanks Aunt Lucy.

4. And how delusion is it to think that waking up January 1 you will somehow be this different (and WAY better) version of yourself?  You might be a bagel loving fiend.  What makes you think the minute we hit 2023 you will suddenly crave nothing but Greek yogurt with fruit every morning?  We convince ourselves of this BS only to liberally scold ourselves when we wake up Jan 2 and eat half a bagel of shame.

What’s so wrong with us just like this?  Or in other words, THERE’S NO NEW YOU COMING AND WE DON’T WANT ONE!

All that to say, skip the New Year’s Resolutions this year.  Or better yet, make a New Year’s Resolution to love yourself MORE.  To love yourself EVERYDAY.  To love yourself COMPLETELY.  That is the truly difficult resolution.

If your brain can’t possibly manage that, then try something new.  Try making the smallest change possible.   Instead of saying, “this year I am going to yoga everyday” and then be super disappointed when something comes up Day#2.  Instead say, “I’m going to go to yoga once a week” or even “I’m going to go to yoga once a month.”

Your brain will scoff at this and say it is USELESS but I disagree.  If you come once a month, that’s 12 yoga classes you will have taken in a year.  12 hours that you committed to yourself.  12 hours of pure relaxation.  A full workday of self-care.  If you come once a week, that’s 52 HOURS OF BLISS.  More than a workweek of time devoted to taking care of yourself.

No matter what you decide, do so from a place of love.  Do it gently, with no shame.  Love yourself first and most.